When I was a kid, maybe around six or seven, my mom took me to see the film The Emigrants.
(possibly it was the sequel The New Land. I realize from reading about both films on Wikipedia that unless I re-watch the Emigrants, and I plan to, I can't actually be sure which one I saw as a child. Maybe I saw both.)
The Emigrants is a grim Swedish film about rural hardship with no hope of improvement and a few families who try for something better in Minnesota. It was definitely not meant as a kid's film.
But I drank it in as I did the other two fairly inappropriate films my mom took me to see as a kid in the early/mid 70s: Dog Day Afternoon* and Oh Lucky Man**.
I mention this childhood cinematic memory because of a tense moment in the film that caused me to react with fear and my mom to respond with three perfect words. It was a moment that stood out from the general atmosphere of tolerance and open mindedness that I was brought up in. It was more than just part of the cumulative effect of growing up in that environment.
In the scene, one of the female characters is pregnant and alone in her cabin out in the wilds of the expanding US. (At least that's how I remember it).
Suddenly there appears in the doorway a fierce looking American Indian (sorry I have no idea from which tribe). The entire focus narrows down to that moment of uncertainty, their eyes on each other, her vulnerability and his wariness.
"He's scary", I whispered into the hush of the packed cinema. My mom leaned down and whispered back.
"No, he's not."
Only three words and only a few seconds out of my entire childhood. But these words, I realize now, had a profound effect on me. With that tiny sentence she opened up a whole world of free thinking. She kicked through a hole in the wall of propaganda that promotes all sorts of nasty agendas. She could just as easily have said, DON'T BELIEVE THE HYPE.
The think for yourself seed was planted and sprouted immediately. As a teenager I began to realize that indoctrination had been a huge part of my education and that chunks of history had been avoided or delivered from a winner's perspective.
In reality a scenario like that in the film could have been dangerous for that woman, and I have no remembrance of what happened after that scene (I really do need to re-watch this film). Maybe he did attack her. Though I think I would have remembered that.
Either way it doesn't matter. My mom was not speaking from naivety, she was not telling me to be blindly trusting. She was speaking of a reality that said don't expect people to act a certain way because that's what you have been taught. Be very cautious about these narratives, they are based on prejudice, fear and arrogance.
And I thank her for that.
*Dog day Afternoon gave me an early and enduring appreciation of Al Pacino's charisma.
**I believe this is a very underrated film. (Again, I need to re-watch it). The fantastic music (we owned the record) is by the keyboardist of the Animals Alan Price, in fact I think the entire band drives up in a van in some scene and gives the main character a lift. And it stars another very charismatic lad of the day Malcolm McDowell.
In defense of my mom's decision to bring us to these films, she was short on babysitters (we had a seriously absent dad). My brother was clever and likely convinced her that we should go see these films because he wanted to. Whatever the reason, I'm glad she took me. In fairness, we also went to great kid's films such as Oliver, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and the incredible musical Jesus Christ Superstar, (OK that last one isn't really a kid's film.) Great film though that teaches you everything you need to know about the New Testament. Sorted! And it's all sung to you.
Trailer for The Emigrants
(possibly it was the sequel The New Land. I realize from reading about both films on Wikipedia that unless I re-watch the Emigrants, and I plan to, I can't actually be sure which one I saw as a child. Maybe I saw both.)
The Emigrants is a grim Swedish film about rural hardship with no hope of improvement and a few families who try for something better in Minnesota. It was definitely not meant as a kid's film.
But I drank it in as I did the other two fairly inappropriate films my mom took me to see as a kid in the early/mid 70s: Dog Day Afternoon* and Oh Lucky Man**.
I mention this childhood cinematic memory because of a tense moment in the film that caused me to react with fear and my mom to respond with three perfect words. It was a moment that stood out from the general atmosphere of tolerance and open mindedness that I was brought up in. It was more than just part of the cumulative effect of growing up in that environment.
In the scene, one of the female characters is pregnant and alone in her cabin out in the wilds of the expanding US. (At least that's how I remember it).
Suddenly there appears in the doorway a fierce looking American Indian (sorry I have no idea from which tribe). The entire focus narrows down to that moment of uncertainty, their eyes on each other, her vulnerability and his wariness.
"He's scary", I whispered into the hush of the packed cinema. My mom leaned down and whispered back.
"No, he's not."
Only three words and only a few seconds out of my entire childhood. But these words, I realize now, had a profound effect on me. With that tiny sentence she opened up a whole world of free thinking. She kicked through a hole in the wall of propaganda that promotes all sorts of nasty agendas. She could just as easily have said, DON'T BELIEVE THE HYPE.
The think for yourself seed was planted and sprouted immediately. As a teenager I began to realize that indoctrination had been a huge part of my education and that chunks of history had been avoided or delivered from a winner's perspective.
In reality a scenario like that in the film could have been dangerous for that woman, and I have no remembrance of what happened after that scene (I really do need to re-watch this film). Maybe he did attack her. Though I think I would have remembered that.
Either way it doesn't matter. My mom was not speaking from naivety, she was not telling me to be blindly trusting. She was speaking of a reality that said don't expect people to act a certain way because that's what you have been taught. Be very cautious about these narratives, they are based on prejudice, fear and arrogance.
And I thank her for that.
*Dog day Afternoon gave me an early and enduring appreciation of Al Pacino's charisma.
**I believe this is a very underrated film. (Again, I need to re-watch it). The fantastic music (we owned the record) is by the keyboardist of the Animals Alan Price, in fact I think the entire band drives up in a van in some scene and gives the main character a lift. And it stars another very charismatic lad of the day Malcolm McDowell.
In defense of my mom's decision to bring us to these films, she was short on babysitters (we had a seriously absent dad). My brother was clever and likely convinced her that we should go see these films because he wanted to. Whatever the reason, I'm glad she took me. In fairness, we also went to great kid's films such as Oliver, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and the incredible musical Jesus Christ Superstar, (OK that last one isn't really a kid's film.) Great film though that teaches you everything you need to know about the New Testament. Sorted! And it's all sung to you.
Trailer for The Emigrants
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7QfS0FlLQmE
God it's hard to believe that this is the official trailer of the day. They certainly weren't as attention grabbing as they are these days. The Emigrants, though not fast-paced, is pretty amazing and not as tedious as those snippets would have you believe: like you'd be reacting to the film as the church crowd does to his sermon.
Couldn't resist putting this in. Love Al Pacino!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ne6KMHLTvik&t=4s
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sRz_3pok1Og
Oh Lucky Man (who knew Helen Mirren was in it as well)
God it's hard to believe that this is the official trailer of the day. They certainly weren't as attention grabbing as they are these days. The Emigrants, though not fast-paced, is pretty amazing and not as tedious as those snippets would have you believe: like you'd be reacting to the film as the church crowd does to his sermon.
Couldn't resist putting this in. Love Al Pacino!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ne6KMHLTvik&t=4s
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sRz_3pok1Og
Oh Lucky Man (who knew Helen Mirren was in it as well)
There is another inspired parenting moment that stands out. This wasn't a breach in the wall moment but more a brick taken away, or one less built up. I believe, the main role of parents is to provide space for the child’s own natural goodness to expand while instilling positive behavior through example and discussion.
Parents are facilitators.
Parents are facilitators.
Unfortunately, because parents are trapped by their own emotional and societal walls this role is not an easy one to maintain.
A poster of
Monet’s Regatta at Argenteuil hung in the living room of my
childhood home. I adored it, the soft colors, the depth of the basin, its pure
blue water and matching sky. I wanted to climb into that painting and breathe
the fresh, easy breeze, jump into that refreshing water.
This
wanting to be part of it inspired me to climb up on the table and draw a small
ink boat in front of the other boats sailing so serenely. My artistic ability
was simplistic, it was a boat fit for a stick figure and I placed one at the
helm.
Instead of
anger and scolding, my mom expressed delight. She celebrated my artistic
initiative and her smile said she enjoyed my innocent irreverence. Her
generous response showed strength and lightheartedness, humor and creativity.
A good
life lesson to pass on to your children.
To see painting, click on link.
No comments:
Post a Comment